Michelle Grewe's Writer's Portfolio

The Feat of Conquering the Little Feet

Can you do anything being interrupted every 30 seconds? And sometimes the interruptions are simple like, “Can I shove this in my nose?” No. “But why?” Because I said so. “Ok. What about this?”

Anybody Else Leave Your Tree Up All Year Long? Anybody?

I have a confession to make. Someone call a priest, open up the grape vine, and let the PTA convene because this is gonna make at least one of those three drop their Bible and gasp…

How to Make Blow Jobs a Job that doesn't Blow

We all know that bobbing the knob isn't the most exciting thing for women to do with their lives, but it doesn't have to suck. You do. But the job itself doesn't have to.

10 Ways White People Can Help Make Black Lives Matter

The #BlackLivesMatter movement is open to all races. It’s a tribe to end oppression and embrace equality. If you really believe in equality, then #BlackLivesMatters to you.

22 Ways to Deal with PTSD—Plus One Reason to Hope!

PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and TBI (Traumatic Brain Injury) kills an average of 22 veterans a day. Mission 22 is a collaborative effort of vets and organizations to help save veteran lives.

12 Ways to Prevent Autistic Meltdowns

Avoiding the meltdown entirely and reducing meltdowns are the best working solutions, and they are often long-term goals that can’t be done overnight.

The Dirty Bottle Under the Bed

Television shows about perfect families in black and white were later replaced with full color versions of dysfunction. Roseanne Barr basically came crashing through the Leave it to Beaver threshold like the KoolAid Man and added reality checks like working moms, cheap dinners, nagging grandmothers, lazy husbands, and ungrateful, hateful teenagers who make bad life decisions.

Her Love Shined Through

I almost missed my grandmother's story because I simply didn't listen well enough when she was alive. I didn't ask questions. I didn't get to know her beyond the woman who bought me a chocolate bar every time she went to get more beer, or the woman who stood up for me when the whole family was against me. Not while she was alive anyway. The most important things I could possibly learn about my grandmother, I learned from her ghost.

Chicken Drums Divorce Planning

I swear I can read his mind now on account of the fact that we have been married for almost ten years, and I get more mad at the things he’s thinking than what he says. Then he starts getting angry at the things he thinks I’m thinking about what he’s thinking. Basically, we have telepathic arguments, and they’re heated, raw, and uncut.


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